Sunday, April 11, 2010

Charity Date Auction 3

“I’m here.”

“That much would seem to be evident,” Spock replied, lifting an eyebrow.

EE took that as his cue and closed the door behind him, whereupon a man with a wooden leg and a harpoon sidled up to him, peering at his face. “White,” the man said, and turned his attention to EE’s not inconsiderable girth. “Whale.” He raised the harpoon.

Spock stopped him. “I believe you’ll find, Captain Ahab, that he is not actually a member of the order Cetacea and therefore not the whale to which you refer.”

“Yet whale he is,” cackled Yoda. “But think you not such bulk hides it might a powerful master of the force? As they seem things not always are.”

“Yeah, whatever,” EE said. “Are they ready for us on stage?”

“This is the intellectual date auction,” Ahab said, still eying EE suspiciously. “Figure it out yourself.”

“Intellectual? They told me it was for looks!”

“Yeah? Just be glad you weren’t on last night, with Queequeg.”

“Gentlemen, you’re on,” called a matronly woman, and they filed on stage to the applause of an average geek’s dream—100+ geeky women.

Yoda went to a woman in a Darth Vader mask and a Leia-captured-by-Jabba outfit. Spock went to a serious-looking woman carrying a graphing calculator, a pencil, and a binder of calculations. Ahab went to an 11th grade English teacher. As for EE—well, the Brenda Novak auction is coming soon!

--_*rachel*_

No comments: